Trying to Welcome the Wait

This is my fabulous husband, whom I love dearly. He is soo patient with me and he loves me despite how flawed I am. And trust me, I am flawed. This past 6 months has been kinda rough on me emotionally. I don't know what it is. I mean, I am so blessed and have so much to be thankful for. We have traveled the world in our 4 short years of marriage, I have a great job that I am really enjoying this year, and truly have some of the best friends anyone could ask for. I guess I have just been so melancholy over what God has been working on in me. It really dates back to July-ish. Caleb and I had decided about a year before that we would begin to venture down the road towards having a baby in August.. However, with Caleb beginning to pursue his MBA, we decided that it would be best if we wait until closer to his graduation. Immediately I was sad, and really began to grieve the loss of the life I was hoping we would have in the next year. There were so many things that I pictured in my mind being "the last before a baby" and all of a sudden those pictures changed. No longer would our Italy trip be "the last hurrah", nor would my school year be the last sans a baby. That lasted until sometime in August, when I finally got on my face before the Lord and just wept. I was beyond what I could handle on my own, which I know is exactly where He wanted me. I was trying to grieve alone, trying to be ok with something I really wasn't and trying to put on a happy face, pretending like I had it all together when I really couldn't be any further from that. I have always thought it to be so cliche, but in that moment when I was literally laying flat on the ground, face down the burden of my grief just dissipated.

Since that day, I have been in a season of restoration. He's restoring me to a right relationship with Him, where I trust His providence, love my husband more deeply, and really just savor this time to grow together before our lives are forever changed.

So... with that, I need to go plan my next vacation I didn't think I'd have!! Ski slopes, here we come!

The most AMAZING husband ever!!

Well folks, I must say that this time I have a GREAT excuse for the time between posts! Why, you might ask?? Because I have the most incredible husband ever! Let me explain... Last Wednesday was our anniversary- 3 years! About a month and a half ago, my husband shared with me that he was going to be out of town in Enid, Oklahoma for our anniversary on business. Well, I was quite sad, but understanding since he travels semi-frequently on business. It was even ok since we wouldn't be celebrating in the middle of the week anyways. So, we started talking about what we wanted to do. We are still in the middle of working on the house, just the outside these days, so we didn't want to spend too much money. Plus we've been talking about our "mission statement," so I thought it would be great to go camping. We talked about camping and Caleb just let me know that he wanted to take care of planning the weekend. Last Tuesday I washed clothes and he let me know that I would need to pack for the both of us for the weekend and should focus on bringing comfortable clothes, i.e. jeans, sweats, etc. So, I got geared up for what I thought would be a weekend of camping. And you must understand that for me, a Hayes girl, I had to get geared up mentally, since the only camping this girl had ever done was in the living room of her house underneath sheets suspended by couches and chairs. In the mean time, my wonderful friend Laura saved the day with an invitation to get massages on my anniversary since Caleb would be gone. Of course I said yes and so on Wednesday I got ready for an evening of fun. I was waiting at home for Laura with the blinds open and peeked outside to see a car that didn't look like Lauras, but didn't think anything of it right off hand. Well, by the time I did a double take I saw my precious husband walking up the sidewalk with a single red rose in his hand. He told me the trip was canceled last minute so we were going out for dinner and that we needed to go. I hopped in the car and was given a blindfold. Well, about twenty minutes and lots of speculation later, we arrived. Caleb got out of the car, came around to open my door, put a book in my hand and told me to open my eyes. What did I see?? Lots of cars... then I looked down at the book to see a Frommers New York City guidebook in my hands! Caleb told me that we were leaving right then to fly to NYC for a long weekend to see Megan and Will (my sis and her hubby) and have fun around town! After lots of questions about work and worry about who was going to cover my meetings (which of course my husband had taken care of 2 months ago--almost half of the staff at my school knew about this and were in on it!). Soo... for my anniversary my wonderful husband absolutely surprised me with one of the best surprises! Stay tuned for pics and details on the fun long-weekend getaway!

Valentine's Day.. Only Slightly Past Due!

I have to brag BIG TIME on my husband for making this Valentine's Day an extraordinary one! Caleb and his friend, Trog, got together and planned an unusually special evening for Trog's wife, Mendi, and I. It all started when they told us to meet at the Trogdon apartment at 5:15pm. Through the lies of both of our husbands, we thought the boys would be joining us there but were soon instructed over the phone to open Trog's dresser drawer. There we found a green envelope that contained a puzzle with OUR FIRST CLUE! We were about to partake in a scavenger hunt, yippee!! Our first destination was Starbucks where the cashier granted us gift cards and another green envelope. After solving a word puzzle, we were led to Barnes and Noble at Stonebriar Mall to receive a book and another clue which sent us off to Victoria's Secret.. or at least someone's secret, so we thought! Little did we know it was the V.S. at a different mall! We learned this important little tidbit of information only after walking back to the car to get the camera, then around the wrong mall for more than 30 minutes, asking every store that seemed like a "secret" (about 10 total stores) if they had a green envelope. Needless to say, we got lots of "what are you talking about?" looks! We faced the reality that not only were we at the wrong place, but we also were not donning the proper shoes for the occasion and had the bloody heels to prove it! After finding the right mall and the right V.S., we obtained our next clue and another little gift.... Sorry folks, Victoria said this gift was a "secret"! We then found ourselves at Bath & Body Works for some bath essentials (and band-aids for our heels!) and a clue leading us to Whole Foods. No gift this time, just our next clue hidden under a jar of Oregano! After solving a Sudoku puzzle and talking to my mom on the phone for directions (she asked if we were cheating... we didn't care at that point because we were starving and our feet were killing us!), we were led to a flower shop on Beltline where we were each given a beautiful red rose and another green envelope. It was now off to the Marriott Hotel in which we had a hunch that our hunt was coming to an end and that we were about to spend a romantic night away from home. To our dismay, the front desk hostess handed us an envelope not holding two room keys but a piece of paper saying "text NOT STAYING HERE to get your next clue"! Our last clue landed us at our apartment for our final surprise......a candlelight dinner! Little did we know that as we were scavaging the entire North Dallas Metroplex, Caleb and Trog had been grocery shopping and cooking (actually learning to cook) a meal for us! The table and mood were set and we were served a full course meal including bread, salad, chicken, veggies, and cheesecake. It was absolutely perfect and was the best Valentine's Day a girl could have. Mendi decided we wouldn't mind celebrating the Day of Love together more often... and really anytime our husbands decide it's a occasion worthy of cooking up a good meal!! Thanks for all your hard work babe! It was well worth it! 143!